My Need for Prayer

It has been a while since I have written. Can you tell I am in summer school and working full time and still doing volunteer ministry at church? It has been a difficult couple of days in my life. As I was writing a paper for school yesterday, I struggled with anxiety! It was difficult to organize the paper and it did not help I was anxious inside. I put my head down on the laptop and prayed for God to help me. I was at a lose for words as I sought for his help. Difficult days are good because they draw me to prayer. When life is easy, I run on auto pilot and do not pray as much. This of course, is not a good thing. God desires for me to be praying and communicating with him throughout my wake filled hours of the day even when "life is good." I wonder if I will EVER learn that lesson. God, please keep teaching me. Forgive me for my times of complacency in prayer.

Maybe???

I have been required to do a lot of reading for the class I am currently taking. Each week, I am reading at least 2 books in the Bible. This week I read through the gospels of Mark and Luke. And having to read through them quickly, I find I am not able to truly "take in the Word" that actually changes my life. I am reading it strictly for academic purposes. I remember hearing a statement once that said something like "it isn't how much of the Bible you can get through, but how much the Bible can get through to you". At times like these, where I am reading for a course, I am not enjoying the academic part of this particular time of reading. I want the Word to get through to me - my heart. Because honestly, I need changing. And as much as it is good to be taking this course and learning the historical evidence of Jesus, I am finding a hunger for the Word to feed me and my life. For this new hunger, I am grateful.

Who knows, maybe in someway, the Word IS getting through to me even though I am reading academically!